The Dark Half
REVIEW DATE: 1:17:0:0
All right, enough of this flu crap. Time to get up off my honkey ass and do something productive.
But, since that would be boring, I guess I'll update this site instead.
Whether we want to or not, we video critics tend to gravitate towards certain
niches. Greywizard is the most obvious example, reviewing mostly straight to video horrors
(who may or may not fit in that genre). Chris and Scott gravitate toward the lost movies
of the 80s that today's actors would rather no put on their resumes. And Dr. Freex dives
into that stagnant pool of movies we all remember watching wide eyed on channel 3's
Saturday afternoon matinees where the picture was always fuzzy, but we were still wowed by
the "stunningly realistic" special effects.
And me? I review Stephen King movies.
Doesn't sound very exciting when I say it like that, does it?
I don't really know how it happened. I just started with The Shining and some monstrous snowball effect took over. And now I half to have the whole set. I can't help myself. Gotta catch 'um all.
My real attraction to The Dark Half, though, came when I figured out it was written for the screen and directed by George A. Romero. Yes-a, True Believer, that George A. Romero! The George A. Romero who came da-own from the mountain to give us Night of the Living Dead-a! The same George A. Romero who gave us three, that's three-a, the most influential zombie movies of our time-a. The same George A. Romero who is so influential to the genre of horr-ah that I have no choice but to write this paragraph in the voice of a Baptist preach-a. Praise George!
Amen.
Well, now that that's over . . .
Like most of the S-man's books, our hero is a writer. His name is Thad Beaumont (Timothy Hutton), and, when he was a boy (and was played by Patrick Brannan) he began the career that would eventually carry him to greatness: writing. But, with the writing, came horrible migraines and a seizure that landed him in the hospital.
Under the surgeon's knife, Thad's long lost brother is found: a twin, absorbed into Thad's body when they were both in the fetal stage. Somehow, this twin began to grow again. The twin is removed (in a nicely done surgery scene, complete with blinking, malformed eye), its flesh is buried, nobody bothers to tell Thad, all is forgotten.
Years pass. Thad writes a couple of books about "yuppies and fagots". The critics rave. The public is unaroused. So Thad decides to put on a different face and writes several brutal crime novels about a guy named Alexis Machine under the name George Stark. He and his wife (Amy Madigan) get quite rich off of Mr. Stark, and set up a nice, comfortable house to raise their year-old twins. Thad as a nice day job teaching at the university and life is sweet.
Then, one day, a monkey wrench comes along. The monkey wrench's name is Fred Clawson (Robert Joy), and he happens by Thad's door one day saying, either Thad cuts him a check, or Fred blows the whistle. You see, no one knows Thad and George are the same guy. Maybe if they do, Clawson says, they won't want to buy any more of George's books.
Seeing the logic, the Beaumonts do the only thing they can: kill George Stark, going so far as to have a big ceremony for an article in People magazine (complete with a little tombstone proclaiming Stark, "Not a very nice guy").
But maybe George doesn't want to die. Maybe he wants a life. Maybe he wants Thad's life. And, considering he isn't a very nice guy, maybe he'll do whatever it takes to get that life.
So, this being a Stephen King novel, George Stark gains physical form (which is also played by Timothy Hutton) and goes on a killing spree, intent on frightening his yuppie alter ego into writing another novel. A George Stark novel, that is.
Now, I'm judging the movie here, not the book, but both suffer from the same problems. I'm not really feeling Thad, since their aren't enough scenes of him being a loving father, or loving husband to offset Stark's killing spree. Also, in several early scenes, Thad appears to be really schizo. Insane in the membrane, ya know wha I'm sayin'? I'm not down wit' that, dog. Wouldn't it be dope keepin' him completely Starkless thus illistratin' the (*ahem*) stark diff-er-ence between himself and his doppelganger?
"Um, Psy?"
Whuz up?
"Gangsters wouldn't use the world 'doppelganger.' Keep you're dialects straight, man"
What 'chu mean, dog? Dey'd use any word dey damn well please. Wanna make somethin' of it?
"Yo, man, I's cool."
Damn right. Now, another thing both book and movie have that's whack: they don't end, they stop. Oh sure, the main conflict is solved, but what about all the little secondary conflicts that are set up? For example: Stark has Thad's fingerprints, so The Man blams Thad for every dead guy in the movie (the count gets to 7 by the end). Now, without Stark's body, what do you think the cops are gonna do when Thad tells them, "It wasn't me, it was my pen name come to life and out for revenge,"? Will they
(A) Lock Thad's ass into the slammer and convict him for murder using their mountain of forensic evidence?
(B) Believe Thad, and blame all the murders on the nationally recognizable name of George Stark?
(C) Blame it on a psycho only thought he was George Stark. Fingerprints? What fingerprints? (This would be the LAPD scenario.)
(D) Pat Thad on the head and, in true Irish cop fashion, say, "Aye, laddie, did yer pseudonym geet outa yer head? Well, see that it donna happen again," and walk off, whistling and swinging their Billie club?
Well?
As an actor, Hutton does a good job in both roles (even though, in the book, Thad and George looked nothing like each other). The decision for him to play both people showcases his range. Or, what there is of it.
Michael Rooker, the second man to play Sheriff Alan Pangborn in two Stephen King movies (the other being Needful Things) is no Ed Harris. And the lines he says emphasize this. Mostly, Rocker growls his way through this thing, as he does in all his movies, it seems. (And, just in case you're wondering, the events in this story are supposed to take place before Needful Things. This explains why Castle Rock is still in one piece.)
All in all, The Dark Half is a good re-thinking of Dr. Jeckle and Mr. Hyde. But the execution needs more work.
