I haven't had much luck with theme months. My one attempt (Monster Month) kinda sputtered out after a few weeks when I realized I didn't really need it. I'd review daikaiju movies for no other reason then because I like to watch them (some would say a little to much). So I scrubbed it.
However, on a dark and stormy night (we got lots of those down here this time of year - we still float, though) I thought about turning January into the Month of "O". Month of "O". Brings to mind a few things, doesn't it? Like that old Steve Martin bit ("I would like to some time of to have a month long, extended orgasm. Of course, my lovely wife could join in.")
The reasoning behind it was basic. I sorely need to fill the void of movies that start with "O" in my Vault. But my hatred of Themes popped up again, like a Jack-in-the-box on smack. So, no. I don't think we'll be doing that any time soon.
But . . .
Before Jack-o managed to get into my brain I did grab Operation Condor from the shelves on a recent video store safari. You see, there's another void in the Vault. One I can feed with complete ease: Jackie Chan, the immortal action star. The man who's made more Kung Fu movies then I could list (besides, the IMDb does it for me). The dude which every American movie distributor is waving like a golden flag because he does All His Own Stunts.
Almost a year and not one Jackie Chan movie. That just blows the big one. Time to correct my mistakes
Operation Condor, though not as maniacally successful as Rumble in the Bronx does stand out 'cuz its written directed and starring Jackie Chan. Apparently, by the time Condor got off the ground Chan had driven all the other directors of Hong Kong insane.
As we open, Chan is going the high road by ripping off Indiana Jones. However, during the obligatory Native People's Riot Chan does more cool acrobatics then Harrison Ford could pull off in his wildest dreams. He also pulls one of the strangest escapes in movie history. Yes, friend, we are on Chan's World, now.
Chan's World, you see, is a magical mystical place discovered by Stomp Tokyo, where everything is constructed to help Jackie Chan do cool stuff. There's lots of glass to throw people in, lots of multi-level buildings to jump and fall off of, and lots of other things to assist Chan in bringing his Marx brothers style of action/comedy to the screen. Must be a great place to live in if you're Jackie Chan.
Anyway, here Jackie plays a secret agent hired by the U.S. to retrieve a stash of lost gold hidden somewhere in the Sahara by a Nazi garrison. Tagging along for comic relief (both odious and otherwise) are 2 women, Ada (Carol 'Do Do' Cheng) desert survival specialist and Elsa (Eva Cobo) the granddaughter of the Nazi commander. Together, they must stop their own personality clashes and dodge mercenaries, mobsters, and Arabs, all of which have suddenly figured out that the gold exists.
Hey, what can I say? This is prime Jackie Chan coolness. I'm not sure what the kicker really is, but it's there. Maybe its the fact that it's all him. The guy driving that motorcycle backwards down the street? Him. The guy jumping from hotel balcony to hotel balcony? Him. The guy fighting off twenty armed people with whatever happens to be lying on the floor? Him.
And Chan's very presence ups the fun meter. Not only watching his acrobatics, but the way he gives new twists to old action scenes (and their clichés) is excellent because of its quirky originality. Take the car chase scene. When you watch this movie (not if, when) keep in mind that James Bond could never have this much fun in a car chase. The writers and actors involved take themselves to seriously. Chan however, knows how to have fun with himself and his movies. And we have fun along with him.
Oh, there are other characters here, too, but so what? The problem here is that the women are screaming victims, existing only to get caught by various Bad Guys so Chan can save them by doing his thing. The villains are villains. As flat as the TV they dance across. Plus, why exactly has everyone waited until now to go after the gold?
And what's up with the ventilation shaft of death?
But that's the way Chan's World works. Fortunately, another law of Chan's World states that Jackie must go through lots of physical punishment as he jumps through the hoops of this strange script.
At least I can lay some of that strangeness on the somewhat crappy dubbing. Cantonese is almost as bad to dub as Japanese.
I love Chan, and his world, but there's just to many weird things popping up in this movie's plot for me to give it the rating it was gonna get before I started thinking about all this. It isn't the best way to get a Jackie Chan fix, but you hardcore Chan fans should get a kick out of it. No pun intended.
No, really, I mean it.
Gs
MOCK O' METER
