I
know this movie's main problem. Scream's Resident Nerd, Randy (Jamie Kennedy) never
got to tell us what you have to do if you want your sequel to become a franchise. You know
the line, don't you?
RANDY: And number 3, if you want your sequel to become a franchise never, ever--
Were I in Randy's shoes that line would go something like this:
DR. PSY IN RANDY'S SHOES: --never, ever mess with success. If you've got a great creative team of actors, writers and/or directors you do not wanna fuck with that.
Damn Hollywood, they never listen.
And, there's Cotton Weary, stuck on the LA freeway and complaining about getting a bit part playing himself in the new movie Stab 3: Back to Woodsborough. Apparently, his beef is that he does a walk on and gets killed in the first 5 minuets. So, what happens? Cotton gets a call from a man with a very familiar voice and a knife to Cotton's girlfriend's throat.
2 dead bodies in the first 10 minuets. Joe Bob Briggs would be proud.
Now we see where the familiar faces have gone since the last movie. Gale Weathers (Courteney Cox Arquette) is still practicing her slice-um-dice-um style of journalism and has found acceptance in LA. This time, however, the cops come to her with these new murders, marking the first time in a horror movie where cops actually use their brains.
While "working for the police", Gale visits the set of Stab 3 setting up some great comedy and meeting Dewey (David Arquette), he being the movies "technical advisor".
Way up in the Hollywood hills we find Sidney (Neve Campbell) has given up all pretence of living a normal life. She works for the Women's Crisis Hotline since that's a job she can do from her home phone. It's a solitary life, with only her dog and occasional visits from Dad to keep her company. She's pretty shaken by these new murders. Especially when the killer calls her with her unlisted number.
Panicked, Sid decides to come out of hiding, uniting with her friends and the other cast members of Stab 3, so they can all die a happy death together.
I hate when things fall short of their potential. The absence of writer Kevin Williamson is felt, man. Citing that he was "to busy" to write the script, somebody, who was obviously suffering from brain damage, hired Ehren Kruger (very Wes Cravenish name, isn't it?) to write this script based on Williamson's outline. Couldn't they have waited for Williamson's schedule to clear up and released this thing for Christmas? Would that be such a big problem?
Oh, Kruger is good. But he isn't Williamson. Kev's comedy was based on giving knowing winks to the audience. Kruger does this sparingly, keeping the movie mostly in the horror suspense/genre. How traditional of him.
Okay, it's not like this movie is a piece of crap. It's not. All your friends (or, at least, my friends) who are condemning this movie (without even watching it, no less) are wrong in their broad, sweeping generalization. Williamson found another way to put another twist on this theme, and it's a good one, too. There is still comedy here, particularly when the leads meet their counterparts in the movie Stab. However, Scream 3's problems are (ironically) 3 fold.
1. Characters are out of character. Would Sidney really wander around a darkened set? Really? Would Dewy and Gale split up so often only to reunite? Really?
2. There's only one killer, this time. Just one. What the slag is that? The very thing that set's the Screams apart is their theme of two killers.
3. Those little in-jokes. Or complete lack there of. With Randy gone, there's almost no one around to point out how silly the goings on really are. Aside from a few snatches in the character's dialogue (that feel forced, to tell you the truth) they just aren't there.
The up side, however, is Randy's legacy where he explains the rules of a trilogy to our characters. There's just something about his kinetic energy that gets me. I love it.
The other actors, however, simply do well with what they are given. In Sid's case, that isn't much. What does it say when your main character is barely involved in the plot? Aside from the last battle, Sid really doesn't get much to do here. *sigh* It's that potential thing again. Campbell is so good at playing Sidney that it's a shame to see her get second bid.
Instead the movie seams to focus on Dewey and Gale's relationship. Or what they hope will become a relationship. The actors here know their characters and perform them well, the familiarity makes me care. It's just, well, this isn't really their series, now is it?
Our actors do well with what they are given. The writer does well with what he was given. The ending is solid enough that I couldn't guess it this time around. Craven does well enough to pass with a solid B. To bad it's prequels were such A list movies. It just feels like there's something missing. Or, rather, someone.
Gs (out of a possible five)
SOMEWHERE, A WRITER IS SHAKING HIS HEAD.
